Hope for all of us...

I'll warn you now, this is pretty sappy stuff, so if you're not a romantic at heart, or just ate something, you may want to skip this post.

Earlier this afternoon, I was killing time on XTube...you know, doing research...

Well, anyway, I came across something that was totally refreshing, completely unpornographic and really great (though you may want to turn off the sound...)



There really is no back story involved here; the only information is that the poster is a 21-year-old guy from the US.

Usually I would feel that pang of jealousy and sadness at what someone has and I do not, but today it really struck me as something hopeful. I mean, here are two guys my age, clearly in love and really happy.

This pretty much sums up my heavily-romanticized hope and aspiration; finding someone I think is adorable inside and out, falling for them, and finding out they feel the same way too. Realizing that your attraction is the real, true deal, and being able to just be your goofy natural self with the person you love. It's almost palatable how these two click with each other, how well each compliments the other.

Actually, watching this makes me feel pretty old...these guys are the same age I am, yet I wonder if I'll ever get to have this youthful, blissful love.

And it scares me, because it hasn't happened yet, and deep down I wonder if it ever will before it's too late.

Sure, there is no depth to this; it doesn't tell the story of where they came from and who they are. There isn't the behind-the-scenes of how fucked up or brilliant their lives are, where they met, and how things 'really' are. But it does show to me that two young people are capable of finding each other, falling madly in love and staying that way.

And that's something that, at any age and in any place in life, should give us all hope.

How I want to find myself in love...

Before I went away, I loaded up my iPod with lots of music I hadn't necessarily heard before. I wanted stuff to keep me busy on the long train rides and the overseas flights. So I would set my iPod on shuffle, and lay back, enjoying the tunes that would be pulled from the most unlikely places.

This song really caught me, I still listen to it once a day. The lyrics...well...they pretty much encapsulate the entire feeling I hope to have when I meet the man of my dreams.

I don't know wheather it's a generational delusion, or if it's a fantasy that certain people have about relationships. We all hear of the people who yearn for the white picket fence, the happy couple, the kiss every evening when walking in the door...well, I've never dreamed of that. Instead, I want someone who's my equal, someone I don't need to flipantly kiss every time I see them to let them know how much I love them/how much they love me. I want the love that sophisticated 30-somethings want...all I want is you...(carly simon/jacob brackman/andy goldmark)

"What do the neighbors say
when they hear us scream at night?
Do they talk about a love
all in tatters?
What do the neighbors know
about the heart and soul
the fire down below
really matters.

They could never guess
in the silences
that all I want is you
and the sexy hurricane that we share.
All I want is you
I don't want a man who says 'good morning dear'
All I want is you, nobody else but you.

Let them listen at the door
let them listen through the floor
let them go ahead and draw the wrong conclusions.

So chase me around the room
make me crazy like the moon
They could never guess
in the silences...

That all I want is you..."

Ah, to be young and in love...

A very Happy Valentines Day to everyone!

I know that most people knock it because it's a fabricated holiday, with little actual meaning. If you don't show your partner you love them regularily, why bother being in a relationship?

But I disagree. For all those who shower their partner in attention and love every other day of the year, do it double time today. Make your partner and yourself feel extra special. Why not? It's not like it hurts anybody, and it's one day of the year where you're allowed to be totally, completely, undevidedly dedicated to your mate.

I'm going to have my first Valentines in my 20 years that I actually get to spend it with someone I'm even remotely interested. This will be an experience for me, something that I'm just so looking forward to having. I'm so into it that I actually texted 15 people this morning to say Happy Valentines, as if we were still in school handing out stupid 2" paper cards.

So for all you singles out there, I feel your pain. No matter how much you say you don't care, or how you loathe couples who are going to be making out on the street everywhere you go today, just remember some lyrics that I can't help but type today (because I'm in such a Valentines mood):

'When you think that love is only,
For the lucky and the strong,
Just remember, in the winter,
Far beneath the bitter snow,
Lies the seed, that with the sun's love,
In the spring, becomes,
The rose.'