One of the things that's fun about blogging is reading other blogs and getting to know other bloggers.
I know many people say that I should stop comparing myself to others, stop drawing differences or similarities between what my life has brought me and what people in similar situations have had thrown their way.
But my reply is always the same; you have no idea what you might be missing, have better or worse than others if you have nothing to compare it to. And with blogging, we get a (partially) unbiased view of the lives of people all over the world.
Since I've been very lax about links and updating things, I thought I'd take the time now to introduce you to a blogger I just picked up on. Jake over at Ten Minute Nap seems like a pretty nice guy. Apparently this isn't his first blog, but it's where he currently vents about life and (lack of) love.
He's very musically-inclined, which is awesome. And his picture is cute.
Like I said before, it's interesting to get such access into the lives of others, and to see how he's grown up differently than me. It's also interesting to see the dynamics of life in different sized cities and towns.
And for his part, Jake seems to do a pretty good job at getting to know the guys in his area. What always strikes me about smaller cities is how their gay residents all seem to be drawn together. From what I've read, he's met guys from all across the spectrum, befriended them, hung out with them... I guess my point is that it seems to come easier than living in a big city.
I've always wondered how different my life would have been had I done two things, pursued music more and gone to university in a smaller city. While Jake can't really compare with me musically (since he sounds quite talented), I can sort of see how differently life would have gone at a smaller university.
For one, it feels as though the community in the abstract is a lot smaller, especially students. People know people, everyone is forced into the same pool, more or less. It's prone to dramatics and love triangles, but it's also easier to put one's self out there.
And ultimately, it feels to me like it's a lot less intimidating and a lot more inviting on a smaller scale. There will always be power dynamics, but overall, people seem more open minded and a little more gentle. There isn't as much of the stereotyped gayness that plagues big cities.
Plus, the boys seem more friendly.
I'll never know what it's like to go to university in a small city, but thanks to others we get a firsthand account of just what goes on all across America...
5 comments:
I went to a big university for 2 years. Then I dropped out, took a year off, then transferred to a much smaller university in a smaller town to finish my degree.
Going to the smaller university was the best thing I ever did for myself--my relationships were better, more intimate, my classes were better taught and easier to understand, there was less needless "competition," and there were fewer destructive distractions.
Wait, you study music? Somehow, I either forgot that or didn't pick up on that after reading your blog all this time. Maybe I'm just tired, who knows.
I go to a large university, but grad school is rather small compared to undergrad here. So it's refreshing to get a bit more attention at the grad level than at the undergrad level. I'm not sure I would've enjoyed going to a smaller university/college, sometimes I just like to "blend in and disappear into the crowd."
hey. i just found ur blog for the first time. trying to catch up on ur life. = )
Hey mate!
U know it really depends on the genre of people in trhat small town you are eyeing. i belong to this really small town with the best music institute in the country. And 'boys' here are anything but friendly. Of course, everyone knows everyone else. Specially with me, I dunno, but my gaydar works too strongly! However, strike a conversation and u'd know how fake and supeficial one can be.
I know everyone around and have been pretending to be friendly coz i don't want them to bytch about me just coz i m not what they would define as a 'sport'. The guys here have one thing on their mind-DICK! And they'd do anything to get it. And once they do, they couldn't care less!
So much for small town coziness!
Thank you so much for this entry! I never expect people to really notice my blog haha and it was a huge surprise to see that you had written about me. I shall return the favor soon!
This past weekend I visited the University of Cincinnati because I'm interested in it for Grad school, and I couldn't grasp the size of it! My school is the smallest in the SUNY system in New York, with only like 4,000 students. Yeah, basically everyone knows everyone, which I like a lot. I made friends very easily and have really found a place where I can belong. The weird thing though is that we're in the north country of new york, where nobody is really out, and yet there is a large number of gay students at my school. It's like we all flock there (it doesn't help that we have a music school haha). Sometimes I do regret not going to a bigger school because sometimes it can feel like my school is TOO small, where everyone talks and whatever. But I don't know, I feel comfortable here and I guess that's what matters most when you chose a school.
Again, thanks so much for this shoutout. I'm going to add you to my blog list and I'll follow you on here :)
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